You think you feel better, then you don’t


I posted not even a week ago about my recovery and how great it’s going. Well, damnit, it has taken a turn. Which means, I get to call Dr. Friedlanders office tomorrow.

Honestly the past few days have been going downhill. It started with a small pain around my eyebrows and had has progressed to involving my entire, freakin head.

I can still eat though. 🙂

I will admit, though, I haven’t exactly just been sitting around on my ass. That’s not really possible with 2 three-year-olds running around.

I’m really hoping that it’s nothing major. Just a headache, even though those were supposed to stop.. I don’t think I’ve ever felt so weak and helpless in my life and I feel horrible because of how it’s affecting my family. I am still on my weight lifting restriction (I can’t pick up anything weighing more than 5 lbs…I can’t even pick up my damn cat.) meaning I can’t pick up my boys. I haven’t picked up and held my boys in almost a month. A MONTH! Do you know how much that just rips out a parent’s heart? My 3-year-olds reach out for me to just pick them up and snuggle them and I have to tell them no. Something I used to do all the time, I can’t do anymore. Well, for now. Eventually I will be able to pick them up again, but for now, it just sucks.

Now, they can sit on my lap. If I’m sitting down and they don’t hold onto my neck. They do understand that mommy has a booboo and it hurts, but they don’t understand how much the booboo hurts.

And Greg, I feel like right now I’m a pain in his ass. I ask him to do everything for me. Not so much now, but in the beginning, yeah he did everything. I couldn’t even get out of bed without someone being right next to me. Now, I don’t want to stay in bed. I’ve been there too much.

But, as I said a few paragraphs up, I haven’t really been, um, “good”. I have carried laundry baskets up from the basement. I can guarantee they weigh more than 5 lbs. I’ve done the dishes, which isn’t too bad. It has helped with my standing up without feeling like I’m going to barf up Easter dinner. But I’m pretty sure sweeping and cleaning the kitchen floors doesn’t help. So, really, I guess I have nobody to blame but myself. (And no, Greg wasn’t home when I was naughty and did my extremeness. He was at work. It was all secret. Shhhh…and yeah, he did yell at me.)

I am kind of nervous about this being a CSF leak. It was the biggest thing that could happen after the surgery and unfortunately I’ll have to go back in to see the good doc and get yet another MRI.

For now, I’m going to make popcorn, then going to bed and just waiting for his office to open. Fingers crossed folks!

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8 thoughts on “You think you feel better, then you don’t

  1. Sounds kinda like a spinal headache almost? My mom had one after she had an LP and said it was the worst ever. Should be fairly similar after your procedure. And if you’ve been up and about, it could be something like that?

    • I talked to one of Dr. Friedlander’s schedulers today, I’ll find out by next week what’s wrong. I go in on Thursday for a CT Scan and to see the good doc. They never said anything about spinal headaches, but considering they did shave off some of my C1 and C2, it’s possible. They were more worried about CSF Leaks than anything, so I’m guessing the CT is a precausionary thing to make sure it’s not that.

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