Busin it with the sick


I work two days a week. (I love you part-time) Saturday’s and Sunday’s. Being that I only work two days a week, yes I do go in during the week occasionally at nights, I just bus it in.

Public transportation sucks. I’ve ranted about it before. It’s over crowded, people are rude and you never know who you’re going to end up next to.

You’ve all seen zombie movies right? You’ve seen how someone may appear a little sick, then starts moaning, looks at the person and then just eats them.

Kind of like….this…

I wouldn’t really mind becoming a zombie, except for one thing. It would hurt like f*cking hell. Seriously, think about it. In order to be turned you have to be bitten by someone who is already a zombie. That zombie is a mindless eating machine. They have no self-control. All zombies want to do is eat your flesh and organs. How can you trust that the zombie will stop after one bit?

Not to mention being bitten hurts. My 3-year-olds bite me all the time, little bites, and they hurt like hell. I don’t want some full-grown zombie taking a chunk out of my ass. No thanks.

So, back to public transportation.

I was sitting on the bus this morning on my way to work when this woman I was sitting next to just starts wheezing and moaning. I freaked out. I stood and got off at the next stop. Luckily it was the one I needed. The first thing that popped into my head was this woman was either going to start a pandemic on the overly crowded bus and Pittsburgh would become ground zero for some major quarantine (I’ve watched contagion and the crazies in the past week…sorry.) or she was a muda fudgin zombie who was going to bite my ass.

Either way I wasn’t taking any chances.

Oh…by the way…today…I feel like shit. So that woman probably was sick and that wheezing and moaning spread her infectious germs to me. Great.

 

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