We finally watched The Little Fockers last night. I was disappointed in it. It wasn’t nearly as funny as the first two.
However, Rozz Focker gave good sex advice for couples…go out and have an affair.
What is this you say?
Have an affair? Don’t you preach about fidelity and how remaining faithful is the way to be?
Yes, I do. But having an affair could save your marriage. How is this possible and why am I telling you to have an affair? The same reason they did in the movie. Go have an affair with your spouse!
Seems odd and when I heard it I was a bit wary, but after thinking about it for a few minutes, it’s not bad advice.
Like I’ve said in previous posts, marriages and sex can become stale and boring. You and your partner can end up falling into a rut and do the same thing day after day after day. After spending so many years with one person, the intimacy tends to wane and flutter out.
This is when one spouse, or both, tend to get wandering eyes. They may be watching someone and wonder what else is out there? What are they missing? Then a conversation with someone of the opposite sex can get dangerously close to crossing the line, or they do. If it continues to stay at the border of inappropriate or slightly over it’s entirely possible that an affair can ensue. Even if it’s not a physical affair, emotional ones can be just as devastating.
So, why not spice it up? Even if it’s with a bit of role play, what’s it going to hurt? So you find out what you like and what you don’t like and if pretending to have an affair is for you, go for it. Pretending doesn’t make you a bad person, just a kinky one.
What do I mean when I say “pretend to have an affair”? Send dirty texts, send raunchy emails and make a “secret” plan to meet up at a hotel or restaurant. Go out and get a new outfit, get your hair and nails done and then go meet up with your lover. (Your significant other…obviously)
Even though you would be meeting up with the man/woman who you wake up next to every morning, the thrill of making it seem illicit and naughty could be the paprika that your marriage is looking for. Plus, who doesn’t like playing pretend every now and then? Who doesn’t like getting dolled up and going to a nice hotel? The change of scenery, a bottle of wine and some strawberries can help with the eliminating the dullness of every day life or sex.
Getting a hotel for the night or weekend is also another way you can act out some of your fantasies. You’re in a different place and no kids to worry about. You can let your imagination take off and do whatever you want.
Remember that a marriage is an adventure in itself and sometimes it just needs a little help. Even if that means pretending and doing other things that seem odd, but are thrilling. Marriage is a risky business. Unlike dating or having a “special” friend, feelings run deeper. There’s more to lose. You could lose your family. Your wife/husband and/or kids. Give spicing things up a chance before heading off for that actual affair. Who knows, you just might like it.