Today is one of those days for me. Day of absolute stress and just no good bad moods.
It didn’t start that way but as the hours ticked by, it happened. A bad mood set it and stress took over.
It may have started from the whiny kids, the shitty diet or the fact I didn’t drink my first cup of coffee until noon.
Either way, stress has a firm hold on me today and it’s a rotten day.
Last Friday was my grams 85th birthday. Today, the “family” planned a big birthday dinner for everybody to go to. Everybody that is except my husband, children and myself. Yes, everybody was invited but us. That kind of threw me over the edge. My mother tried to smooth things over by giving me the ol’, “Well, I just found out to” speech but ya know what…nope. There was no reason someone couldn’t have told all of us sooner.
I’m not close to my mother’s side of the family. Well, not all of them. There are a few I talk to sometimes. Not on the phone, not in person but on Facebook. Does that count? I used to be close with them. I practically grew up at my grams and pappy’s house, which is why not being invited/told about the party (or any other “family” get together) hurts. You would think after all the years of being left out I’d be used to it. But no, each time my family (including my mother and brother) are left out of things it stings and hurts. I shouldn’t care. I really shouldn’t. Perhaps I’ll stop caring…Right now I wouldn’t mind if we ended up having move across the country. (Yes, I’m feeling sorry for myself right now.)
Either way, it’s a beautiful day, we’re going to the park in a bit and I’m in a terrible mood. I’m not sure every drop of coffee in the world could help me out today.
Every thing the kids do today seems to be irritating. Don’t gasp and say, “Oh my God but those are your kids!” Every mother has a day when absolutely everything will irritate them. It doesn’t make us bad moms or awful people. It makes us human.
That’s right, I’m human.
So what do I do when I’m stressed out and hating everything? I sulk and drink coffee.
If I keep this up I’ll be out of coffee and self-pity by tomorrow.