Getting dressed

As a mother of boys I am so glad I don’t have a daughter.

Before anyone’s panties get into a knot let me explain.

For mothers who teach their daughters self-respect and that they don’t have to let their hoo haa’s be seen from their shorts or skirts and they don’t have to have all of the ta ta’s hanging out of the top and bottom of their shirts, this is not geared toward you but for the ones who don’t put their foot down and act like a mother and let their child walk out of the house in whatever they want or see no problem dressing like a stripper, this is why I’m glad I have just boys.

Pretty much everybody has a mirror or reflective surface somewhere in their house. Use it. Please.

As you are looking in the mirror look at what you are wearing.

Are your shorts so short it looks as though your bum is eating your pants? If so pack them away with the rest of the baby clothes and go buy a pair that really fits.

Is the waist band on your pants/shorts/skirt so tight that it disappears into your flesh? If so, go pack them away with the rest of your baby clothes and buy bigger pants.

Are your shorts so short that your vagina can hang over either side of the leg portion? If so, please for the love of God pack those away in the baby clothes and get longer shorts! I don’t care if you’re a size 2 or a size 52…nobody in their right mind wants to see your hoo haa hanging out!

Is your shirt cropped so much that everybody can see the underneath of your ta ta’s? If so, pack it away with your baby clothes, go buy a bra and a longer shirt. Nobody wants to see your boobs.

Is your shirt so tight that you can see every dimple in your muffin top or you can’t breathe? If so, pack it away with the rest of your baby clothes and buy something that fits.

Now as you look in the mirror ask yourself this, “Would this work on the stripper pole?” If your answer is yes or maybe, go back to your room and try again.

You changed so now you ask this, “Will I be mistaken for a prostitute?” If your answer if yes or maybe, go back to your room and try again.

Do you see what I’m getting at? Whether your 10 or 50. Size 0 or size 30…nobody wants to see what’s under, well supposed to be under, your clothes. I don’t want my children looking at a girl and asking me, “Mom, why can I see her private parts?”

Do you know how hard it would be to explain to a small child that she is just dressing like a…slut…and you really don’t know why?

I don’t want to have to go through that. I don’t. I don’t want to see some 16-year-old girls hoo haa AND ta ta’s as we’re driving down the street.

Have some self-respect. Again, it’s not a size thing, it’s a respect thing. Not only for yourself but every other human being in this world. They do make sizes bigger than newborn and 0. If you want to wear something revealing, do it in taste. You can be sexy and still have your skin covered.

If you are a bit heavier and are under the delusion you’re a size 5 when you’re a size 18…just don’t. If you are a size 8 and think you’re a size 5, that is why you’re clothing feels tight. They don’t fit. Don’t be ashamed of a size 8 and if you are, work out until you are a size 5. But please don’t wear that size if you’re not that size.

That’s all I wanted to say today.
Thank you for listening and I hope I helped some people out with the bluntness.
Which if you are embarrassed/offended you’re guilty of one or more of the above mentioned atrocities so go fix it!.


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