End of the rope

We all know this feeling.

You’re stressed, the kids haven’t stopped screaming and fighting, you slept for a total of 4 hours last night because of work or staying up till 3 am reading Soulless by Gail Carriger and it was at least 80 your bedroom. (Awesome series by the way, I highly recommend it.)

You wake up and go to see your little rays of sunshine. The apples of your eye. The two beings you squeezed out of your very own body, but instead are confronted with these 2 little monsters who have your children’s appearance. Surly these two screaming, whiny kids who threw their toys every where, tore their blankets off their beds and opened their window all the way knowing that is a no-no are not the precious toddlers you put to bed last night! Did someone replace your children? Perhaps they were possessed in the middle of the night by some mother hating monster who knows how to push your every button.

Taking a deep breath, you start your day, already knowing what it’s going to be like.

As you make your way downstairs, no children in your arms, you hear the blood curdling scream. Yes, it’s that sort of day. You must carry them downstairs. All 60 lbs of toddler. (They both weigh 30 lbs a piece. Well there abouts.) You pop in Cars, get them some Capt n Crunch and oj and sit down. More screaming. This one is touching that one. That one is too close to this one. Then the toy box is dumped upside down, the crayons and doodling pads, coloring books and play-dough come out. Still screaming. Cars is over, you pop in Gnomeo and Juliet and fix lunch. Now it’s that one is touching this one’s plate. This one is grabbing that ones cup. You look at them and say, “GRRAAAAA!” Not really a word, sentence or anything. Just a noise because you don’t know what else to say.

It’s about here that your temples begin to throb, the migraine is setting in and your blood is boiling, not because of the 85 degree heat outside either. You rush them to eat their lunch and get into the living room. You make up a nice little nap area on the floor so they can relax and take a much needed nap. More for your sake than theirs, even though the puffy, little, red eyes do indicate that sleep is needed. It’s 3 pm, they’ve been up long enough, toddlers do need to sleep.

20 minutes later, they are laying there, screaming at each other. That one is touching this one again. This one is grabbing that ones sippy cup. That one is stretching out his shirt and now we poop. Change pull-ups since we won’t poo on the potty and back to fighting the nap. Now, they don’t just lay there touching each other, it’s rolling on the floor. Rolling over the dog, who is cranky from the 2 hour walk you took her on last night (which you are still getting dirty looks from her for.), and into the kitchen. The temples are really throbbing now. You try to hold it in, but it escapes. You use their full names in a louder than indoor voice.

They stop dead in their tracks and stare at you with eyes the size of bread plates. Uh, oh…mom yelled the full names! That means trouble. Even I knew as a kid that if mom used the entire name, that meant I was in big trouble and I’d better start listening right now otherwise my backside was going to be hurting. Chad, one of my brothers, never really learned that. I’m slightly surprised his bum isn’t a permanent red.

As you stand there, hands on your hips and tapping your foot with that look on your face (once you get pregnant you develop “mom face”, it’s the narrowed eyes, puckered lips and flaring nostrils. We all get it.) and they just stand there with their hands behind their backs and heads down. Then that one looks up and smiles. He puts his hands on his hips and tries to tap his foot. You can’t stay mad.

Attempt nap time number 3. That lasts 5 minutes before you stand up and tell them to get their butts upstairs to their rooms or else. You’re not sure what or else is but it gets them the move on. Half an hour later, you’re writing your blog and semi relaxed.

We all get to the end of our ropes. Sometimes more than others. Usually if you have 2+ children you reach the end of your rope faster than someone with 1. My temples aren’t throbbing anymore and they have 45 minutes to get their butts to sleep before or else comes out again. If you have the screaming, fighting kids, don’t feel bad about putting them in their rooms. Sometimes they need just as much as you do. Plus, putting them someplace, such as their bedroom, with a few toys will help them tire themselves out faster so they do fall asleep and you don’t go completely insane. Giving yourself a bit of alone time during the day, on days like this, does not make you a bad parent. Remember that.



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