The End is Near?

It is Sunday, May 22, 2011.

Mr. Camping your prediction was wrong…again. I believe it’s time for you to give up predicting the rapture and end of the Earth.

So, 1 end of the world prediction down, 2 to go.


Yes. 2.

One is the whole Mayan thing. Dec. 21, 2012. (Yeah, 4 days before Christmas) Have you ever seen the movie 2012? Yeah, it has great graphics and the story isn’t horrible either. I like it. And no, I’m not a 2012er. I just like the movie.

Anyway, Dec. 21,2012 is the end of the Mayan calendar. That’s it. Just the end of the calendar. If you were writing a calendar for a few thousand years…wouldn’t you be sick of writing it? I would.

But, that’s not why they stopped. That’s when the stars were done, or something along those lines. Which means, at least from what I understand, the calendar just starts over. I’m no expert so I could be wrong.

That’s prediction 1.

Prediction 2…zombies.
Yes, zombies. If you’ve been living under a rock and haven’t seen the CDC’s zombie warning,,

go there. Read it.

Zombies are the undead. Walking, flesh and brain eating dead. There are a bunch of movies and tv shows you can watch if you’ve never seen zombies. Zombieland is my favorite. It’s funny and it gives survival rules. Plus, it has Bill Murray. I love Bill Murray. He’s hilarious.

There’s also Resident Evil but I don’t have Alice like powers.

Night of the Living dead, Dawn of the Dead, Day of the Dead, also good movies. Kinda gross but good.

The Walking Dead is a REALLY good tv show. Season 1 ended a few months ago and I CANNOT wait till it comes back this fall. It’s AMAZING!!!! It makes you feel bad for the zombies. It shows the human in the zombie.

Now, it’s not real. The CDC is trying to get a way for more people to read about natural disaster preparedness. Either way, it’s a good survival guide for the zombiepocalpse. The only thing they’re forgetting?

You’ll need a gun. Shoot them once between the eyes and bam…bye-bye zombie. Destroy the brain of a zombie, destroy the entire zombie.

I need to invest in a zombirific gun.

Oh, yeah. Board up your doors and windows. Nothing worse than having a zombie bust through your kitchen window. You could have all the canned spam your pantry can hold; however, if a rotting, smelly zombie busts through your front window or door, well, it was nice knowing you. Unless you have a zombirific gun, then you might make it out alive.

If you don’t plan on holing up in your own house, locate the nearest zombie-free refugee camp. Just make sure it really exists and isn’t a false hope. I’d prefer to stay in my own house. As long as there were sufficient provisions and zombirific guns of course. Hopefully it won’t take the CDC long to come up with an antidote, cure, vaccine or round up all those pesky zombies.

In all seriousness though, read through it. It gives good pointers and tips if you are ever in a natural disaster or a natural disaster prone area. Everybody should be prepared for one. Whether you live in Pittsburgh, Florida, Texas or California. It’s always good to be prepared. Have an evacuation plan ready for your family. Have extra supplies and be zombie ready!


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